Dear Life

Friday, February 09, 2007

dear life 82

dear life,
do you know that you really suck sometimes? have you ever wondered about how a mom can manage the loss of her only son? a son she has just said goodbye for a great day of skiing and having fun with friends? a son she has become closer and closer to over the past year or so since dad moved out? a son she has poured her life and heart into making as happy as possible?
You really suck, you know? As i watched her looking into nothingness, as i watched his picture next to the white flowers and candles burning, i remembered her once saying to me that she wished he would one day find a bride like me, but what did she know? i remembered seeing him flirting with his lovely girlfriend, him making fun with his mom in his calm shy way about no matter what, and of her telling me how he was all she had and lived for. How could she see this doom day?
You really suck sometimes, you know? Today i took my ipod and went out for a walk during which i tried to think of nothing but the walk itself, not you ofcourse. and guess what, there it was, a folder on my playlist entitled "Dara's selection", the first collection i ever put on my ipod. Where is Dara now? What are his mom and dad going to do? How can they manage you? How can his girlfriend manage you? and his friends, all tasting the bitter taste of losing someone dear to a force they can do nothing to but to sit and watch, to bear in silence, to accept and to live on?
We can only calm ourselves by thinking that the calm pure boy we all knew with those lively naughty twinkles in his eyes has gone forward to a better place. We can only calm ourselves by thinking that there is a higher reason for this all, and we can only pray for his mom and dad, his beloved, his causin who were a sister to him, his aunt, grandpa, and all family and friends to be bestowed patience to live through this.
How do you find the heart to sit and watch their desperation, their loneliness, their suffering, and their missing him so bad they want to rip their clothes off? How can you? How?

Monday, February 05, 2007

dear life 81

dear life,
did you know that every three minutes one woman dies due to intentional abortion around the world?
did you know that suicide is the third cause of death among adolescents around the world? did you know that women commit suicide more than men, but men die more of it because of the more violent methods they use? did you know that using pesticides is the first method to commit suicide?
well, you know now! where are we going really? suicide, abortion, divorce, war, poverty, political conflicts, global warming, pollution, depression, unjust distribution of resources ... guess i better not continue with the list.